A Pressing Social Issue

As you may or may not well know, we here at What Blogs May Come are all about the pressing social issues of the day. From North Korean madness to American consumerism to Enronian ethics, we've got it all right here.

Today's edition is about the social issue. It's an announcement to all ages, races, and families. Panta ta ethne. Para todo el mundo.

An issue, nay, an axiom so fundamental to existence, so critical to the sustainability of human economy, that it affects every aspect of this empirical experiment we call life.

What is this axiom, you ask? This ultimatum of all ideas? This end-all of every conversation?

Orange Juice.

It's delicious. It goes well with every meal. It's nutricious. It's economically viable. It's available every season. It exists without need for category or label. Rain or shine, day or night: Orange Juice is there for you.

The best thing is that you don't have to take my word for it. You see, Orange Juice is objectively good. That means it doesn't depend on me or on you to for its great taste. It's just good. Period. You can take it to Thailand, India, China, Russia; you can take it to black people, white people, Hispanics; you can take it to Europeans and Africans and Antarticans; it's still good.

Here is a brief poem i have written in honor of Orange Juice:

O' Orange Juice,
Orange Juice.

Can i shoot thee down a sluice?
Can i rein thee in a noose?
Why is thy color not on a caboose?
For thee nations shall call a truce.

To thee and thine my heart doth rise;
Beauty like a skylight doth surmise.
Let me get a good surprise,
And let it be Orange Juice.

And there you have it: my ode to Orange Juice. So go, buy lots of Orange Juice. WBMC is not currently endorsing any specific products, but corporate sponsors are certainly welcome. Buy Orange Juice and unite; buy Orange Juice and rejoice; buy Orange Juice and live.